Survival of the Stupidest
by drunkviper21
Summary: What would happen if Goku, Vegeta, & Krillin's families were trapped in Goku's house and for some odd reason there is very little food left. What would they do? How will they survive? Just read on and find out!
1. The Insanity Starts Here

Disclaimer: I don't own Dragon Ball Z. I only did this for fun and I'm really not making any money off this. So you can't sue me, and if you did you wouldn't get anything because I'm poor.  
  
Hey people! This is one of my new fics. It's my second humor one and I think this one's better than the last and probably longer. It's really funny and worth reading.  
  
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Survival of the Stupidest - Chapter 1: The Insanity Starts Here  
  
"Wow, it's snowing like crazy out there" Goten said as he was looking out the window at the giant snow blizzard. "Ya, and we're all trapped in" Trunks added. "Thanks a lot woman. We just came here to visit and now we're trapped" Vegeta said to his wife Bulma. "It's not my fault it snowed. Just forget about it. What ever we do won't change anything" Vegeta got an idea. "Hey Kakarot, come outside for a second, I have to talk to you" "OK Vegeta" Goku quickly replied.  
  
They both walked out and Vegeta flew in the air. The snow hit very hard on them, and the wind blew increasing the impact of the cold snow on their face. Despite that Vegeta shot ki blast after ki blast at Goku. "Hey what are you doing? I thought you wanted to talk" Goku was trying to dodge all the blasts, and was pretty good at it. "I'm going to keep firing at you until you fire back at me!" Vegeta ordered. Goku quickly gave in and shot out a Kamehameha. Vegeta moved to the side and let the blast go up into the sky. They both stood there silent looking up at where the blast went. Vegeta turned around and seemed disappointed. "OK then, I guess nothing we do can change the weather." They both ran inside, freezing.  
  
Goku's stomach immediately grumbled. "Man am I hungry. Chi-Chi, is dinner ready yet?" "It's almost done, just wait a minute" Chi-Chi replied. Before Chi-Chi was making dinner, she was mopping up the place and the floor was still wet. Goten & Trunks were running around chasing each other. "Ha ha you can't catch me" Goten teased. "Bet you I can" Trunks & Goten both sped up and made it onto the kitchen floor. Their feet contacted onto the wet floor and slid them across the kitchen. "Ah look out" they both said in unison. They both hit all of the food that was just prepared.  
  
The food flew across the room. Goku jumped in for a rescue leap but just landed on Vegeta knocking him over. "Damn it you stupid Kakarot. I see how it is. You want payback for outside" Vegeta powered up a ki blast. "No I don't" Goku said. Vegeta stopped powering up. The food by now was on the ground. "Don't worry. We can just wash it off" 18 said. Trunks & Goten were still sliding across the kitchen floor and finally got balance and stepped over all of the food, crushing what they had. "Oops" They both said, knowing what was going to happen next.  
  
Goku & Vegeta both got up and had an evil look in their eye but remained calm, or so it seemed. "Don't worry we won't hurt you" Goku said seriously still not keeping his eyes off them both. Goku & Vegeta both took off their belts off their GI suits. "Run!" Gohan yelled. Vegeta & Goku chased after Goten & Trunks through the living room. "Oh you're going to get it boy. You're ass is mine" Vegeta said to his son. They were now running into the kitchen again. This time they all lost control and fell. Coincidentally Goku landed right on Goten & Vegeta landed right on Trunks.  
  
"I'll teach you to mess with my food!" Goku said. "This is too easy." Vegeta said. They still had their GI belts in their hands and wrapped it around their son's necks and pulled back. Goten & Trunks started to choke but weren't seriously injured. Bulma & Chi-Chi ran to their husbands and tried to pull them off. "That's it Goku, you're sleeping on the sofa tonight" Chi-Chi said. "So what, the sofa is better than you!" Goku said still strangling Goten. "Well Goku you kind of broke the sofa when you tried to save the food" Krillin said. "Damn. Fine" Goku said and let go. Goten held his throat gasping for air. "Thanks for ruining my fun" Goku said.  
  
"The same goes for you Vegeta" Bulma said. Vegeta let go. "Damn it women, you know I can't survive on the sofa. I got that fucking back problem" Vegeta got up and started to search for food in the cabinets along with Goku. "Hey we still have some food. Chi-Chi, make some for us" Goku said. "Ya women. Make the damn food now" Vegeta ordered. "No way! If you want food, then make it your self" Chi-Chi yelled back. "You men are lazy slobs" Bulma said back. "Let's make this interesting. Why don't we go at an all out war? Anything goes. It'll be men vs. women. Which ever side loses, has to make dinner for the other team." Goku said. "This means war assholes" Chi-Chi & Bulma said.  
  
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The poor food *sob* it didn't even get a funeral. It's just that *crying uncontrollably* Anyway now what did you think. I would really like it if you reviewed this. I hope you liked it! The next chapter is when things get stupid if that's even possible, so get ready. 


	2. War Games With A Twist

Disclaimer: I don't own Dragon Ball Z. I only did this for fun and I'm really not making any money off this. So you can't sue me, and if you did you wouldn't get anything because I'm poor.  
  
This is my second chapter and my final for this fic so please review this.  
  
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Right away the two teams divided up and went to the opposite sides of the room. "Guess what I have" Bulma said. "I have a capsulized mini fort" Bulma reached in to her purse and got out a Capsule Case and got out a green capsule and threw it down. From out of a puff of smoke a fort came out. It was brick on all 4 sides and had a pointed roof, like a normal home. "Hey Gohan. We need a fort. Run up to Bulma and grab another fort capsule.  
  
Gohan went behind Bulma and grabbed a capsule fort and threw it to Goku. "Dad catch!" Goku put his hands out and threw it down. "Damn it Gohan! After this you're grounded" Chi-Chi ordered. Gohan slowly walked into his fort and silently sat down. "We need something to battle with!" Vegeta said. "Goten, Trunks, you two go into the basement. Find something good" Goten & Trunks ran down the stairs into the basement. "Pan, Bra you two follow them. Get whatever they get and don't get caught"  
  
Pan & Bra followed after Goten & Trunks. Trunks & Goten grabbed some water guns and glue. "This'll be perfect" Trunks said. "Ya, this too" Goten grabbed some water balloons. Goten & Trunks flew up the stairs and back into their fort. Bra & Pan got out from under the stairs and grabbed exactly what Trunks & Goten did and flew back into their fort.  
  
"You got some good stuff" Krillin said. "Ya, but what do we do" Goku asked. "You stupid Kakarot! Isn't it obvious, you have to fill the water guns with glue and the same for the water guns" They opened up the glue bottles and squeezed it into the water guns and balloons. "OK men fire!" Goku said. "Hey what makes you the fuckin leader. It should be me" Vegeta said. "Just battle damn it"  
  
Goku, Vegeta, & Krillin threw balloons full of glue and Trunks, Goten & Gohan squirted it out of a water gun. The glue flew over to the other side and onto their fort. "Ah duck" Chi-Chi said. All of the women in the fort went close to the ground so they wouldn't get hit. There was a window sin the front so some glue made it through and mostly landed on their asses and back.  
  
"So they want to play tough, then take this" Chi-Chi and the women all fired out glue of their own. The guys got close to the floor. "We're out of ammo." Goku said. "Dad I have to pee" Trunks said. "Me too" Goten pleaded. "Hey why don't you just piss in the water guns" Goku said. "OK men, fire" the urine filled guns shot out piss at the opposing fort. The smell was unbearable. "Eww, I'm going to get you for that" Bulma said.  
  
"I can't take it. This is the stupidest thing I ever did" Trunks said. "Ya I'm out too" Goten said. "Same here" Bra said. "Ya me too" Pan said. They all left. "I guess it's us 4 against you four." Vegeta said. "Hey I have an idea" Bulma whispered. She whispered something into their ears and the remaining women agreed. They all said in unison, "One ... Two ... Three!!!" All of the women jumped out of their fort and they took off their shirts. Goku, Vegeta, Krillin, & Gohan were amazed. They looked on eyes wide open and their minds were set on one thing.  
  
From out of nowhere they all jumped at their wives and ran upstairs. 25 minutes later they were still all upstairs, but in the same bed! "Oh man that was great! I guess we don't have to make dinner for you" Goku said. "What are you talking about! After that we deserve dinner even more" Chi- Chi said. "Oh crap" Vegeta said. Vegeta, Krillin, Goku, & Gohan all were in the kitchen now and were making dinner. "Damn"  
  
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Come on it had to be funny. Come on! Just please review it. I think this is one of my best fics. So please review it. I really need your help. 


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